Nom de Plume
by ThomE.Gemcity-06
Summary: Kevin has a secret; Detective by want, Author by hobby. What happens when Castle finds out the secret he's kept all these years?


**a/n: The concept of "The Gumshoe Twins" and "The P.I. Dual" are my (a.k.a. -06) own story concepts.**

_Kevin has a secret__;__Detective__ by want, Author by hobby. What happens when Castle finds out the secret he's kept all these years?_

**Nom de Plume (Pen Name)**

Detective Kevin Ryan had a secret, one that his best friend and partner didn't know, one that his wife even didn't (until he told her when they got engaged). He'd kept this fact of his life to himself for so long, that it didn't seem right for his friends or anyone else to discover it—let alone him telling them.

It wasn't a bad secret, like he went out into the night when he was off work and Jenny was asleep in bed, and killed stray dogs. No, it was nothing like that. It was just an innocent hobby of his, that turned into a professional hobby after his older sister found out about it on accident. She was the one person who knew from the start. She was also the one who inspired this hobby in him. Unlike most siblings, though she was two years older, they were best friends. Their parents weren't made of money and they lived in a small, two bedroom house where they shared a room. She read to him always. She had a love for literature, and he grew to love it too. She now worked in a publishing company. And though he knew that he wanted to be an Officer of Law, that didn't mean he couldn't do that pastime while he worked to where he was now.

He was the author of the small, but continuing, Mystery series... "_The Gumshoe Twins"_, that currently contains eight novels that have no less than 100 pages and no more than 200 pages. Which is about: two children, brother & sister twins, who, while visiting their great-grandfather, discover in his grand library, a book that takes them into another world where they solve crimes with gumption and imaginative ways.

Of course they are not best-selling books, and are directed towards children 12+—And being as this is a innocent secret of his, these books are under a pseudonym _**Kenny Arvi**_. When you rearrange those letters, you get _Kevin Ryan. _It seemed so obvious to him, that it wasn't to the un-knowing.

His first dedication for his first ever published book of the series, was to his sister:

_"To my sister, who has __inspired__ in me this passion of Literature__, to always take it one step further__"_

But now, as the series grew, and so did he, he wanted to do something more. He wanted to develop the series into a more mature mode. But he'd never had the courage to make that leap, until he met Richard Castle. Five years later, he's ended _The Gumshoe Twins _with ten novels. And has now finished with the novel in his more adult version of the series with "_The P.I. Dual_":

The Book destroyed. The Twins now grown up, and try to find their way through the competitive world of Private Investigators, while trying to restore The Book.

After fretting over it for longer than he should, he had finally sent his manuscript to his sister, who was also his publisher. He got a reply back from her that they were proceeding with getting it published and in stores. It would take a few months. He had dedicated this book to the very man who had inspired him to move up.

"_To my __beautiful__ wife, who has always encouraged me, both in my hobby and my work. To__ my friend__ RC who has __inspired__ my to make the leap into a more complex area of Mystery.__Thank you, and love you both!__"_

All thoughts of that were put on the back burner as work took a hold of his life.

Though Richard Castle had 27 best-selling novels, he still kept his eye on up and coming Mystery Authors. This was how he discovered Kenny Arvi.

Who was this guy? Castle had never even heard the name before. He just came out of nowhere. After doing a quick search on the guy, Castle discovered that he didn't even have a _Wiki_page, he could find no personal information on Arvi, not even a picture. But he did find that he had 10 other novels that were sold on . He couldn't find much info on those either, just that they were childrens' Mystery. Unable to help himself, he ordered all ten, and a pre-order copy of Arvi's new novel "_The P.I. Dual",_ that would hit shelves at the end of the month.

He'd just sat back when Beckett came calling. But even though there was a murder, he wasn't going to forget about this Arvi guy.

"So, you ever heard of this guy?" Castle asked her as they got out of her nondescript car, after telling her about what he had discovered.

Beckett thought about the name for a moment, before she shook her head. "Never heard of him, but maybe that's because he does kids books." She told him.

"Well, not anymore, he doesn't!"

Beckett glanced at him. "Castle... Are you worried?" A grin started to spread across her lips as he scoffed as they crossed the yellow tape.

"Of course not! Why would I be?" But she knew that he was, and he knew that she knew.

They approached Ryan, Esposito and Laney around the body of the victim. "I wouldn't worry about it, Castle. Plus, there's not much you can really do about."

"I told you, I'm not worried." Castle protested.

Esposito looked at them with raised brows. "What's up with you two?"

"Oh, nothing," Beckett cast a sly glance at Castle. "Just Castle worried about losing his best-seller spot."

"What, really?" Ryan asked in shock.

"What? It's nothing like that at all!" Castle exclaimed, glaring at Kate.

"Uh-huh." Esposito nodded eagerly, ready for some teasing material. "Who's this author you're talking about?" He looked to Kate.

"Some guy named Kenny Arvi." Kate told him. "He's got a children's Mystery series, but just recent is publishing into the adult world."

Kevin sucked in a surprised breath, and he flashed them widened eyes. They were talking about him, but they weren't!

Esposito glanced at him. "You okay, bro? You know this joker or something?"

Ryan rapidly shook his head. "No, uh, just remembered that Jenny wanted me to pick up a few things." He quickly covered, and Javier bought it without a second though.

"Man, you are whipped." Javi told him, and Ryan just chuckled nervously in response. "Anyway, Beckett's right, Castle. This guy does children's books, how good can he really be? He's going into your territory now, where you're king, dude."

"I'm, uh, I'll go and talk to the witness a little more." Kevin said, a retreated before any of them could say anything further about Kenny Arvi. His eyes downcast, he crossed the tape. They were insulting him. Saying he sucked, couldn't hack it in real Mystery. But they didn't even know it, didn't know that they were ridiculing their friend right in front of him. He didn't want to feel hurt, but he couldn't help it. He didn't want to be a best-seller, like Castle. He didn't want the fame. He just wanted people to read his work and like it, maybe even be inspired by it—like his sister and Castle did for him. He didn't want the recognition, that was one of the reasons why he used a pen name.

Back at the bullpen, he worked on his computer with less vigour than usual. He couldn't stop thinking about what they were saying at the crime scene. He was being selfish. Thinking about himself when he should be thinking about the victim. What did it matter what they said, it's not like they knew it was him. But it didn't hurt any less. Maybe it would've been worse if they did know. He shook his head, shrugged the thoughts away, and concentrated on the case.

That was working fine until Castle brought it up again when there was a lull in the leads department. "Hey, you think you could look him up, Kenny Arvi?"

"Sure, bro." Esposito sat at his desk and typed in the name—Kevin's fake name.

"Castle," Beckett scolded. "The system isn't there to sate you worries."

"Nothing's coming up, not even a driver's licence." Javier reported, "This guy doesn't even exist."

But he did. He was sitting among them now.

"Hmm. Must be a pen name, then." Castle concluded.

"If it's a pen name," Beckett said, despite herself. "Then there's no way to find out who he really is."

"Hey, guys." Kevin interrupted, "I think I found something that might explain why our victim was killed."

"Shoot," Beckett told him.

The case of the 'mysterious' author on the back burner, Kevin was thankful. "Okay, so check it out..."

Kevin was all to happy to get out of there and head home to Jenny. But during dinner he was quiet and pick at his food more than he ate.

"Honey, what's wrong?" Jenny asked him after putting her fork down. Kevin glanced up at her, opened his mouth. "And don't try and tell me it's nothing," she admonished him softly. "I know you, and I'll know if you're lying."

He closed his mouth and looked at his wife forlornly. "Do you remember about a year ago, when I told you how I wanted to do something more than children's Mystery novels—that I wanted to move onto a more adult genre?" Jenny nodded. "That I was just looking for the right inspiration..."

Jenny looked at him across the small, round table. "You-you found it?" She asked, and Kevin nodded. "But... but if that was true, you'd be more happy." She concluded.

"I found my inspiration." He repeated. She kept silent, waiting for him to get there at his own speed, like she knew he would. He sighed. "Hanging around Castle, his passion for writing _Nikki Heat _and all his other novels—I guess, I guess it just rubbed off on me over the years since he became Beckett's partner. So, over these last few years, I've been drawling the conclusion to _The Gumshoe Twins._ And this past year, since we've been married, I've been working on _The P.I. Dual._..I finished the manuscript about five moths ago, and I scent it to my sister two months ago."

"That's great, Kevin!" Jenny exclaimed.

"I didn't want to tell you until I knew that it was going to get published, I didn't want to tell you bad news."

"But it is getting published?"

Kevin nodded. "After I sent it over, work got kind of hectic, and I haven't though about it much."

She nodded her understanding. "So, what's wrong?"

"Castle's comes to work this morning, talking about an author who might becoming a new best-selling novelist." Kevin explained.

"You?!" Jenny cried out, in happiness. But Kevin doesn't look so happy, she waited for him to continue.

"Before I came home, I called my sister, and she confirms what Castle said. They did a little advertising on my book, and it's gotten some pretty high-profile reviews—even before it's been published... people seem to already be ordering copies. There's already talk of it being a best-seller."

"Kevin..." Jenny sat back as she looked at her husband, her small hands clasped to her chest. "This is all good news, isn't it? They liked your book."

Kevin slumped back in his own chair, his fork discard on his half-full plate. "I love writing, and it makes me happy that people want to read the things that I write. But I never wanted to be a best-selling author!" He leaned forward in his seat again, wanting her to understand. "That's not what this is about!"

"Sweetie," Jenny pushed from the table and walked around to him. She cupped his face, and made him look at her. "I know. I know that this is not about that." She said earnestly, "So tell me, _what_ is this really about?"

Kevin swallowed as he looked up into his wife's eyes, filled with such love. She was the only one who he could really talk to about this. She was his partner, his true love in life. More than writing, more than being a homicide detective.

"Castle was worried about Kenny Arvi becoming a best-seller." Kevin finally told her. "Beckett and Javier tried to cheer him up. They said that he was the King of Mystery, and Arvi—_I_—wrote children's novels cause I can't hack it with _real _writing." His voiced caught at the end.

"Oh, Kevin!" Jenny wrapped her arms around him, and held him tightly against her. Her hand rubbing circles on his back as she pressed her cheek against the top of his head after pecking it. He wrapped his arms around her. She held him for a long moment, before she decided to speak. She was going to have to be the Devil's Advocate here as much as she just wanted to hold him here. "Baby, I know their words hurt you, but you know that they'll never understand unless you tell them."

"I can't," Kevin shook his head against her, and held her tighter still. "I'm not ready, not after this."

"Alright," she squeezed him. "but you're going to have to be strong, for yourself."

"I love you," he pulled slightly away to looked up at her. "More than anything in the world."

Jenny looked down at him. "Kevin, you are the most amazing man that I have ever met." And she kissed him like she never had before.

It was a week later, and Castle was still nowhere on finding who Kenny Arvi really was. And the team had all but forgotten about it. But not Castle. Maybe he _was_ starting to flag, but then a package arrived for him from ,and he was set firm once more.

As much as he wanted to read _The P.I. Dual_, the novel wasn't out for another week, so he had to make due with the complete _The Gum__s__hoe Twin_ series. Each book was of the near same thickness. He picked up the first novel, and the first thing he did was flip to the back-not to glimpse the ending of the story, but the inside of the back cover, to see what was written about the author.

Of course, there was no picture, that would defeat the very purpose of a pen name after all. There were just a few brief lines, stating that Arvi was born in NYC and still lived there; that this was his first published work, and he not only solved crimes on paper, but in real life too.

That gave Castle nothing to work with. He turned back to the front and read the dedication to his sister, before he turned to the first chapter:

"_**Harry and Harper, were more than brother and sister, more than reflections of each other, they were best-friends, they were partners in crime…"**_

It was nearly three hours later when Rick turned the last page and set the book down on his desk in his office, and leaned back in his chair. He took a deep breath, and before he full even realized it, he'd picked up the second novel and cracked it open. Throughout the weekend, he only came out of his office to go to the bathroom, eat, and sleep; the rest of his time, his nose was buried in with _The Gumshoe Twins._

It was Sunday afternoon when he read the closing sequence of the tenth and final novel:

_**"T**__**he twins jump back into great-grandfather's Library. Thumping onto the floor in a tangle, in the closed darkness of the big room. They scrambled to their feet, their hands clasped as they looked back at the open Book. Watched as the world that they had come to know, the friends that they had made, the adventures they had had, and the crimes they solved was destroyed from within. The Book burst into flames, before turning**____**into ash.**_  
___**The Book was gone, things would never be the same for the twins again.**__**"**_

"What?!" Castle exclaimed in dismay, as he turned the page and there was nothing left. "But-but—" he protested. What happened next? What happened to the twins?

This couldn't be the end, it just couldn't. He looked at the ten novels scattered on his desk, but that was it. There were no more. He was dismayed. What Beckett and Esposito said about Kenny Arvi couldn't be father from the truth. These weren't just children's books, these were the eye of the storm, what Mystery really was. Castle wondered what was wrong with people; how were these not best-sellers?!

It was Monday, and Kevin sat at his desk, typing up his report for this latest Case. A man killed his wife and best-friend because he found out they were having an affair—said that if they loved each other so much, they could be together forever in hell, where they belonged. Beckett and Esposito were doing the same, when Castle came in with the oddest expression on his face.

Beckett looked at him. "Castle, what's wrong?"

"I discovered something," he told the three of them, looking each in the eye in turn. "Kenny Arvi might well be one of best Mystery writers yet to be discovered."

Kevin was paying rapt attention now, Castle was talking about _him, _after all.

"What are you talking about?" Kate asked.

Castle took a deep breath as he looked at her. "Over the weekend, I read Arvi's children's series. It was there that I discovered, the passion in his writing. That "It" factor, that you just don't find these days."

Kevin couldn't help himself. "What happened to you're King, and this guy's a joke?"

Castle went directly to Ryan. "_I _never said that, that was all that was those guys." He pointed at Kate and Javier.

Kevin looked the writer directly in the eye, and could see the truth of his words in that dark blue gaze. "You really mean that, Castle?" He asked, his voice quiet, serious.

Castle gripped Kevin's shoulder. "I don't know who Kenny Arvi really is, and maybe I never will. But that man knows how to write Mystery, and no one can deny that."

Kevin smiled. "I'm sure he'd be happy to hear that, especially from someone like you."

Castle stood up. "And I would tell him, because he just got another fan."

"Whatever, Castle." Esposito told him as he leaned back in his chair, "We just said those things to cheer you up, and there you go falling in love with a stranger."

Castle turn to Esposito. "I don't know the man so I can't say to whether I _Like_ him or not. But I can tell you, that it's his _writing_ that I _love."_

"Well, I guess your not worried about the whole best-seller thing, then?" Beckett asked him.

"Not at all," Castle sat in his customary chair at her desk. "In fact, if his next novel does in fact become a best-seller, then I say it's well deserved."

"That's very big of you, Castle." Castle smiled. She continued slyly, "So, you're staying? Does that mean you're going to help with this report?"

The smiled fell from Castle's lips. "Hoh, no!" He exclaimed, jumping up. "You're the one that's on government payroll, not me, so that's _your_ job." He was backing away all the while.

Beckett smiled as she turned back to the computer. "See ya!"

"Later!" and he disappeared into the elevator.

Ryan resumed typing, a smile on his lips. He went home happy that night, no longer feeling melancholy about his writing. He told Jenny the news, and they made love. Though Castle still didn't know who Kenny Arvi really was, Kevin was glad about the man's change of heart.

And that was the last of it, at least for the next few weeks.

When the knock came at the door, Castle flew to it, like a bird of prey dive-bombing to the ground. It was the delivery guy, and the package in his hands was what he'd been waiting for, for weeks. He signed, gave the guy a $50 for service rendered. The guy gave him a surprised look right before Castle shut the door on him, and tore into the package on the way to his office. Despite his Christmas-excitement, he forced himself to slow it down. He sat at his desk, took a deep breath, and opened the box more civilized.

He took out the thick, hard-covered, novel, nearly four-hundred pages. But that didn't matter, he finally had it. He quickly turned to the first chapter and started to read...

"_**As darkness **__**reached**__** upon his apartment, Harry, now twenty-three, made sure the windows were locked, did the same for the doors, **__**and **__**closed all the curtains. He did this ritual almost nightly, before going to his unstable television stand, opened the **__**cupboard**__** where he stored his D.V.D. collection. After removing several cases from the space, he poked his finger into the hole in the back board and pulled. It popped off. In that small space of the false back he kept a box, no bigger than a box of chocolates with two layers. He **__**handled**__** this box with great care, almost as if it were an sleeping baby. He set the box on the table, and opened the top to peer down inside**_**—**_**at the remaining ashes of what had once been The Book**__**…"**_

When Castle had to go to the bathroom, he took the book with him. When Beckett called with a case, he ignored it. He was immersed in this book, couldn't tear his eyes away. But when his eyes felt dry, and he found it hard to focus, and with the crick in his neck from hunching over the book for so long, became unbearable; he was forced to put it down. He didn't want to, but he had to. He needed something in his stomach, and he needed a nap to rest his eyes, and his neck.

So he book-marked his page, went to the kitchen, ate a package of cold pop tarts, and laid on the couch in his office. Just one hour, he told himself as he forced himself to turn his back on his desk and closed his eyes, an hour and he would be back to reading _The P.I. Dual_ with fresh eyes and recovered neck.

Some sort of instinct must have woken him, because when Castle next opened his eyes and looked at him watch, a few minutes more than an hour had past. As much as he wanted to dive straight back in with the twins, he made himself go to the bathroom, and get a glass of juice and a fruit cup before he settle down to finish the story...

_** "**__**This was it, Harry thought, as he **__**glanced**__** at Harper. They had found a way to make The Book whole again. They were going to get **__**back **__**all they had lost, when they were children, when it had been destroy**__**ed**__**. Harry did the **__**honours**__**, he lit the match, and threw it to the pile of ashes**__**—**__**and just as when the twins watched The Book burn in the Library, they clasped hands tightly.**__**"**_

Rick gasped. It had taken a moment, but he had remerged back into the world from this unfinished tale. He was so happy when he had found that _The P.I. Dual_ was the continuing story of _The Gumshoe Twins;_ he wasn't sure what he would have done if he never found out what happened next. Now that he had, he wanted more, _needed _more... **now**. But he knew that a sequel wouldn't be published for at least another year, and that thought was hard.

Arvi was such an amazing writer, and Castle just wanted to meet the "parent" of Harry and Harper. He wanted to meet the man that had mesmerized Richard Castle with his words. Rick really needed to find out who this man truly was.

Now that he had read the novel, he turn to the back flap. It was much the same as in the first book. Still no picture. Arvi lived in New York. He was now married. And solved crime on paper and in real life. Castle flipped back to the front, and read the dedication page.

"_To my __beautiful__ wife, who has always encouraged me, both in my hobby and my work. And to my friend, RC, who has __inspired__ my to make the leap into a more complex area of Mystery.__Thank you, and love you both!__"_

Something that was obvious was staring Rick in the face, but at the moment he couldn't see it, no matter how hard he stared. Arvi gave no name for his wife, just as he hadn't with his sister, but Castle wondered who this "RC" could be. This was the first name of any kind that he had found, and they were initials, but they could be for anyone name.

"Ugh!" This was just so frustrating. He was a Mystery writer himself. He helped solve crimes. He put the pieces together, almost every day. So why couldn't he see what was right in front of him?

He needed fresh eyes, is what. And he knew a bunch of people who detected for a living, who would be perfect to help him. His first thought was to go and ask Beckett, but after ignoring her calls and what happened over the subject weeks before, he wasn't so sure. The same seemed to go doubly for Esposito, this wasn't his kind of bread and butter either. That left Ryan, and after the briefest of brief thoughts, Castle knew that he had found his man.

Though Ryan didn't seem to have heard of the author before; he was a man who liked his literature. He was a nice guy that helped if he could when asked. He even had something of the written word himself. And he was the only one that had taken him sincerely last week, when he talked about Arvi.

Yes, he was just the man.

Kevin was sitting alone in the tech room, reviewing surveillance tape, while Beckett and Esposito where following up on a lead. It was there, where Castle found him.

"Hey, Castle. What are you doing here?" Kevin asked, curious, but also a little nervous, he hadn't been around Castle for a while, since the first mention of Kenny Arvi. "I didn't know you were on the case, you didn't answer when Beckett called."

"Yeah," Castle took the chair next to Ryan. "I was writing. And also reading."

"Oh, is that right. How's that going, by the way—the writing, I mean?"

"Oh. Good, good. But do you remember what we talked about, last week? The author, Kenny Arvi?" Castle asked him.

"Uh, yeah. Vaguely..." Kevin turned back to the television screen, glad that he had a reason not to look at Castle; he wasn't sure he could keep his face from completely betraying his feelings. He wasn't liking the sound of where this was going.

"You know how I was trying to find him, but we found out that Kenny Arvi was actually a pen name. Well I've been trying to figure out who he is, by his bio- and dedication-pages in his books, and I know there's something there—staring at me in the face." He confessed, "But I can't seem to connect the dots."

"Oh, is that right?" Kevin responded automatically, all the while his heart was hammering, and his palms were clammy.

"Yeah," Castle nodded, looking at his friend who was staring resolutely at the screen. "I wanted to ask a favour, and see if you could look at what I have and might find the connection I'm missing?"

Kevin clicked pause on the remote and the screen froze as he took a deep, deep breath, finally looked at Castle. He had to stop this, he needed to make him stop. "Don't you think," he said slowly, "that maybe this guy used a pen name, because he doesn't want people to know his real name? Maybe?"

Castle looked at him for a long moment, chewing the inside of his cheek. "See, if you could just take a look—"

"Castle!" Kevin exclaimed, jumping to his feet, and staring down at the man. "If this guy wants to keep his private life, private, then I'm gonna help keep it that way. Not even one's like you, wanting everyone to know every single thing about you. Jeez!" He threw the control onto the table and stormed out of the room, leaving Castle staring after him with shocked eyes and an open mouth.

Kevin found himself in the men's room. He found it empty, and quickly looked the door to make sure that it stayed that way. What was Castle's problem?! He paced the length between the two toilet stalls, and four urinals, and the sinks. Didn't the man understand that he didn't want to be found, didn't he get that? Why was he so obsessed about this anyhow? It was just a book, it was just words. Or at least they were supposed to be. But to Kevin they weren't, he guessed that Castle seemed to feel the same way.

Castle said the pieces were right in front of him, he just needed that light bulb. Kevin realized that it was this latest novel that were putting him in the cross-hairs, it had to be. That dedication, the one he had fussed over for weeks, he knew it had to be. He'd been to personal. He never stated Jenny's name, but he gave Castle's initials. He was going to be exposed, and wondered just how deep the blood-bath was going to be.

He stopped pacing and looked at himself in the mirror. It wasn't a bad secret, it wasn't a disturbing secret, it wasn't a evil secret—but it was a secret that was pinioned with lies. He'd been lying to his friends for years; Javier, his partner; Beckett his friend. And now Castle, too. He shared everything with these guys, everything but this. He was lying to them, lying to their faces. Each day, for years. He had done it willingly, and knowingly. Maybe, maybe he wasn't such the great guy that everyone conceived him to be. Maybe he was just a big phoney.

Rick watched until Ryan's back disappeared from his view. He sat there for a few minutes, trying to understand what had just happened. Something about this must have touched a nerve in the detective, or maybe he was just sick of him bringing it up like Beckett and Esposito were. When the other man didn't seem to becoming back as long as the writer was still there, Castle decided to leave before he ran into Beckett or Esposito. He didn't want to talk to anyone right now, there was too much to think about.

On the way back to his loft, he thought about what Ryan had said: "_This guy used a pen name, because he doesn't want people to know his real name_."

So maybe his search to find the "real" Kenny Arvi was futile. If this guy really didn't want people to know who the real him was, then there wouldn't be any clue to who he was in the bio or dedication. But there was something there, Castle just knew it. But he couldn't see it, no matter how much he wanted to. Despite what Ryan said, he wanted to meet this man.

He was like a dog with a bone, and he wasn't about to let it go. He would hole-up in his office until he figure this out.

He went through each novel again. For the whole _The Gumshoe Twins_ series, the bio never changes. But the next year, when Arvi wrote _The P.I. Dual_, he got married and made a new friend.

He got a pad and paper, and started to jot down the facts that he knew.

1. Lived in New York

2. Has a sister; older

Castle assumed older, by the way Arvi spoke of her in nearly all of his dedications.

Married

4. Made a new friend; R.C.

And,

5. "He not only solved crimes on paper, but in real life too."

Castle looked at number five for a long moment. Arvi wrote Mystery, but he lived Mystery too. He took that to mean that Arvi either worked for the police in some form, or he was a Private Detective himself (just as Derrick Storm had started out). He added to number five.

5. "He not only solved crimes on paper, but in real life too."; possibly works for the police

Castle read over the list several times more. That connection was still there, hotter than ever. He was so close to touching it that he could feel the burn. _What_ was nagging at him. It was at the corner of his mind. It was yelling at him. It was storming out of the room.

"Oh My God!" Castle exclaimed in shock as that hot connection smacked him in the face. It was there all along. By his side day after day. He knew who Kenny Arvi really was. He wrote the author's name at the button of the page, and beneath that, in block letters, he wrote the true name that lay hidden in those letters.

KEVIN RYAN.

Jenny lay sound asleep beside him, but he couldn't even get a wink himself. After what happened today, he wasn't sure that it ever would. He'd over reacted, he thought. Maybe. But why didn't Castle understand. This was his _private_ life, operative word being "Private". Why did Castle have to come waltzing into his perfectly fine life, and bash it around with a stick?

How was he going to face Castle tomorrow? He wondered if he could call into work sick, or claiming to have a doctor's appointment. But there he was, being selfish again. This latest victim deserved his complete attention like any other, and in order for that to happen, he first needed to sleep... and then he'd confront Castle about Kenny Arvi.

Castle couldn't stop hearing what Ryan had said to him. Maybe he wanted to keep his private life, private. What was he supposed to do now that he knew? Everything that had happened since the first mention of Kenny Arvi now made complete sense.

How Ryan couldn't wait to get out of there when Esposito had insulted his writing, the expression that crossed his face. The way he stiffed up when Castle tried to look up his alias in the DMV. The way that his face lit up, when Castle told him that he had read Arvi's work and fell in love—with _his_ work. And the way he reacted when Castle wouldn't let up on finding who Arvi really was. Everything made sense now as the final pieces were set in place.

Now that he knew, he couldn't fathom how he hadn't seen it from the start. Castle knew he couldn't act the same around the man again, not after he found out the detective's amazing secret. He wanted to tell somebody, but knew that was the worst thing that he could possibly do in this situation. Nonetheless, he knew that he couldn't not just ignore this discovery. And the only person he could talk to it about was the man himself; Kenny Arvi, a.k.a., Kevin Ryan.

Rick just hoped that their friendship wouldn't be ruined by it.

At work it was awkward between the two, respectively they both got questioned by their partners:

"Dude, what's up with you and Castle?"

"Castle, is everything okay between you and Ryan? You've been avoiding each other,"

Their answers the same:

"No idea what you're talking about, Javi."

"_Pss__s__h_, What? There's nothing going on,"

Kevin was going to avoid this for as long as he possibly could, but Beckett and Javier couldn't ever find out, even if Castle eventually did—what he didn't realize was that the writer already knew the truth.

Yeah, Castle knew. But he didn't instantly confront Ryan like he may have done in the past. This was a delicate situation between the two of them. He was sure that Ryan didn't think he knew, that was why their wasn't full-blown panic in his eyes, just suspicion and dread. So it gave Rick time to come up with the perfect confrontation. He wanted to get the young detective alone, that was for sure, away from Becket and Esposito.

It was two weeks of nerve wracking waiting, mostly on Kevin's part, and impatience of Castle's.

They were working a case. Kevin was at his desk, checking out a suspect, while Becket and Esposito were out in the field, canvassing. That was when he got a hit, he picked up his desk phone and dialled Beckett's sell, telling her what he got.

"Okay, go and pick her up." Beckett told him.

"'Kay." Kevin hung up, and got up putting his jacket back on.

"Where you going?" Castle questioned.

Kevin didn't look at him while he spoke, his eyes down as he adjusted his holster. "Pickin' up a suspect," he replied.

"I'll come!" Castle jumped up and started to follow Kevin to the elevator, even before the detective answered.

It was too late to flat-out refuse him now when the elevator door closed them in. Kevin glanced at him askance, but Castle was silent the whole ride down, and in the car as well. He took a patrol car for backup, because he wasn't going to underestimate the suspect just because it was a woman, and who knew what use Castle might be.

With his palm on his gun, he banged on the apartment door, Castle a little-ways behind him, and the unis covering the entrance and exit of the building. "NYPD, ma'am, open up!"

He waited a moment, before he called once more. Not a peep from inside. He glanced back at Castle, took a step back, turned and mule-kicked the door. The jamb splintered as he kicked the door in, and in the same motion, he spun on his heal, his weapon drawn as he entered the apartment, calling out "NYPD!" as he went. He could feel Castle a few steps behind him, following his moves as he cleared the rooms (their issues with each other forgotten for the moment).

The smell hit him first, before he entered the single bedroom that was at the end of the hall. The room was a mess, but not in a slobby way. The nightstand was tipped over, and the lamp lay broken, tokens and figurines from the dresser were half-way across the room, the bureau mirror was broken. There'd been a struggle in this room. But it was clear.

"That's odd," Ryan mumbled. "Where's the smell coming from?"

Castle came into the room and promptly wrinkled his nose. "What's that smell?" he asked, looking at the destruction.

"It's smells like decomp. but there's no body." Kevin remarked.

Castle was quiet for a long moment. "Did you check the closet?"

Ryan looked at the closed door. He raised his weapon in one hand, and laid the other on the closet knob. He waited a brief second before throwing the door open, it wasn't unusual to find a suspect hiding in the closet. He promptly jumped out of the way, as a body came tumbling out of the enclosed space and to the carpet. Kevin holstered his gun, and quickly bent down to check for a pulse, there was none.

He glanced up at Castle before looking back at the victim. "This is not the suspect,"

Castle's brows shot up. "Things just got a little more complicated—and interesting."

Ryan stood, snapped a quick photo with his phone before he dialled Beckett to tell about this new development.

"Alright, I'll get Laney and we'll be there in a few. Start canvassing," she ordered.

He hung up and pocketed the phone. "Come on," he told Castle, leaving the bedroom. "Let's go see if any of the neighbours saw or heard anything." He got a uni to watch the crime scene. Castle followed him without a word.

They were done with the neighbours by the time Beckett and Esposito turned up with Laney; They all claimed to have seen and heard nothing (this seemed like the kind of building where if you saw something, you didn't really see something).

They were at the scene for another two hours, before making their way back to the precinct. Despite having the whole team there, Kevin ended up driven back with Castle instead on Javier. He wanted to know how that happened, but was secretly sure that Castle orchestrated the whole thing.

They were a few blocks away when Castle said ominously, "I know who Kenny Arvi really is,"

It was only years of being on the force, that Kevin didn't have the knee-jerk reaction of jerking the wheel, ploughing into the cars around them, and causing them both to die in a fiery-death. Kevin didn't speak a word, as he quickly pulled to the side of the street in the first available space.

"What?!" He gasped. He found Castle still staring right ahead, as Kevin looked at him, his mouth agape. "How?"

"I had all the facts in front of me, but it was that connecting piece that I needed—that piece that connected the whole thing together." He looked at Kevin, "_You_ gave me that piece."

"I did!"

"Yes. It's what you said to me, that helped me put things together." Kevin silently cursed himself. Castle continued, "That lead me to realized that Kenny Arvi was actually Kevin Ryan—was actually _you."_

_"So?"_ There was no point in trying to deny it, he was found out. He could feel himself filling with dismay. "Are you going to tell the other's now?"

"What?!" Castle exclaimed, "Of course not!"

"Than what?" Kevin said expressionless. "You don't like the books anymore, now that you know who Arvi really is? It that it?"

"What are you talking about?" Castle looked at him in astonishment. How could Ryan think that low of himself, of his work. "Finding out that you're really Arvi, just makes me admire you more. You're an amazing writer, don't you realize that?"

"I'm not like you, Castle!" Ryan exclaimed, all these different feelings welling up inside him. "I love writing, I love it. And I want people to love it too. But they don't have to love _me_ to love _it!_ That's why I created Kenny Arvi, that's why my sister became my publisher, because she understood. So why don't you!?"

Castle held up his hands, wanting Ryan to take a breath. "At first, I didn't." He admitted, and the detective listened with a doubtful expression. "But I've been thinking about it these last two weeks, and I think I understand. You _are_ right, we _are_ different in a writing sense. Me? I'm very out going. I like the attention, and I like the fans. The admiration...and book signings. But you? Your meek. You don't need the attention, or the book signings; you just want the masses to look at your work, and not you. Maybe that makes me petty, but like Beckett says: I'm an attention seeker." He shrugged, "that's just who I am."

"Castle..." Kevin didn't know what to say. He didn't expect it to go this way. He thought that when Castle found out that he was Arvi, he'd throw down his work in disgust, go to Beckett and Esposito and out him, and they'd all hate him for lying to them for years, and then he'd have to transfer to another precinct. Wow, he always thought he was an optimist, but maybe that was just another form of disguise, and he's truly a pessimist.

"I'm sorry I pursued this when it was something that you clearly didn't want to happen," Castle apologized. "I won't tell the others," he promised.

Kevin let out a breath of relief as he saw that Castle wasn't trying to trick him. "I appreciate that, Castle."

"Sure." He nodded. "But I'm also glad that I found this out about you. We have something in common, and that makes us closer friends."

Kevin looked at him for a long moment. "Me too," he said finally, quietly, with a small smile. He guessed that it worked out for the best.

Castle grinned back, and a sudden thought struck him. Now that he knew what a great writer Kevin was, maybe they could to a collaboration!

_f_

_Happy ending!_

_y_


End file.
